Finding My Groove at Work and Life After 52

Hello, Nerds! Hello, fellow weirdos! I had a great week this week. I finally received my new laptop in the mail, the one I’ve been waiting for for a while. It’s custom-built with tailor-made components and costs upwards of $6,000. It is quite a beast of a laptop and can handle any game I throw at it. I'm really happy with it! Also on a brighter note, work is going well for me. I think I've finally found my groove at my job, and I’m not as tired as I was when I was juggling my K.V.S.P. job and my Group Home job. It’s quite a difference! I’ve started to notice that I seem to be drawing some jealousy from the correctional officers (COs) at my job due to their competitive nature. Personally, I’m not very competitive and would rather get along with people. I recently discovered that many people around me, including some guys at the gym, are very competitive, and I didn’t even realize that I had been in an unspoken competition with them for years. I hope to do well in the “game” with the COs and the other guys at the gym. I want them to understand that I’m just trying to get healthy and lead a normal life like any other straight man who works and works out. I’m not trying to one-up anyone for sure. Just yesterday, I caught two younger guys giving me some dirty looks at the gym. One of them is probably in his 20s or 30s. Keep in mind, I’m 52 years old, and at this stage in life, you're really just balancing grandkids or saving for retirement, not competing for women with men in their prime. In a way, it’s quite flattering. Despite my age, I suppose I still pose a perceived threat to these younger men, making me feel somewhat relevant. I hope those two guys understand that men at 52 often feel invisible to women and aren’t looking to compete. Their glares only boosted my ego and made me think, “I must be impressive to these younger guys! LOL!” On a business note, I received my paycheck for May just the other week, and it was a fairly good one—on par with my previous checks. I also got paid on the 20th of May, so overall, it’s been a good month salary-wise. I had a great week, and I’m looking forward to what’s to come with this job! I dare to say it, but maybe I’ve finally found a home and won’t get fired from this job. I don’t know for sure… Anyways, mahalo!