Hello People!!! I had my first few days of work. So far so good although I have a feeling, I will start to get animosity from my other co-workers. In Kern County there is a lot of Marital Status Discrimination, at least for me and I am already getting a tinge of it this week. People always want to analyze my life to see how many women I have been with and this and that, it can get annoying! People just don't understand that some people just don't want to get married or have kids...PERIOD! No explanation necessary! Why can't that be understood? Because their lives with kids are despicable? And my life single by myself is a lot better? Whose fault is that? Mine? Everywhere I go I get this type of treatment. I get verbally assaulted, I get analyzed like a science experiment, and then when people realize that I just want to work well you are just working too hard then fired! Hating and jealousy! I doubt I will last long at California Mentor, and it is because I am a better man than any of the men at work that have kids and people can't accept that. they can't accept that this single man is happier and more motivated than any of the married men with kids at the job. then of course when I am around, they act like their lives are so great with kids, I know it is not they are just fronting LOL! It’s funny how they talk like they have such "Good Lives" with kids when I know they are not living well, but that doesn't mean they have to demonize me. the way I see it if people are going to "FORCE" me to have kids with so many words, then the more I won't have them. I really don't care what they think! Even my own family treats me like crap for no reason other than I don't have kids. As Tren Genius said my family sold me out. Well, if the world won't accept me then I will be accepted by God which is who guides me. I don't know who guides these people in this town who have kids...THE DEVIL! Till Next Time!

Hey People!!!! People read this I Dunno...no they don't LOL! Anyways I just finished 1 week of Orientation in my job and already I can feel slight hostility from people. Not as bad as Omni Family Health but still. I have a feeling I won't last long there...WHO KNOWS!! As long as I build my Savings that is all I care about. On the last day of training, I answered one of the questions of the LVN that kind of was better than the actual answer of the LVN teaching the class and my answer was ignored. Like I said I doubt I will last long at California Mentor. I used to work there, and I had issues, but I need a job and I don't care if I must deal with the same issues that I always deal with at jobs I need money. My first day on the job would be tomorrow, Sunday. A 6am-2pm shift. I would think it would be a chill shift but again I am not getting my hopes up! Give it time people will start hating me it just takes time for them to get to know me then, BOOM! ABSOLUTE HATRED OF ME!!! Anyways enough about work! I haven't heard from my family in months. The last time I texted them was like 5 months ago. I don't plan on hearing from them till Christmas when my mother will fake like she wants to see me for Christmas when really, it’s just a reconnaissance mission for her to see if I am struggling and that I need money from her. My narcissistic mother gets off on Power over me. I am debating whether I should have my family over for Christmas or not, whether I should file a restraining order on them. I am seriously thinking of a restraining order on my mother to show here who has the power in our mother son relationship, which would be ME!! She doesn't understand that she is old and needs to be subservient to her son who is younger and more capable. She still thinks she is in her 20's when she is an old angry 80-year-old that can’t take care of herself and needs her young strong son. I ABSOUTELY HATE HER!

Hi People!!! Another day alone! Boy do I ABSOLUTELY HATE PEOPLE! I mean they hate me, right? So, I hate them. I don't think anyone has talked to me in like months unless they were paid to do it. Otherwise, nobody cared about anything I do not whatsoever. I guess as you get older, you get wise to the cold-heartedness of people. It’s a good thing I am not an alcoholic or didn't develop the urge to drink when sad or down, otherwise I would have been binge drinking like crazy. Instead, I exercise and play videogames. The only thing I have been doing is gaining weight, which is still a problem but at least I am not a homeless wino. Every time I go to the gym I get evil looks from other men, I swear it’s sad, it’s like they are waiting for a chance to watch me go down in a ball of flames! That is what I get for being sober all my life. Intense hostility from people and being ignored by everybody. Sometimes I must control an urge to just shoot up the place. Every time I go to Starbucks nobody wants to sit next to me for no reason, or a reason I don't know about. The isolation that I am being forced into is making me gain weight and it sucks. I start my Job orientation next week on Monday, and I am willing to bet when I work, I will be isolated there too. I will be working alone with nobody within 20 feet of me or helping me, and when I meet all the goals and objectives of the job of all the people on staff, I will be fired for being a saint. I am half expecting people to constantly gang up on me by going up to me and verbally assaulting me with insult after insult, which is what happened at so many jobs for me. I have had to file how many complaints with the Equal Opportunity Board because of it...FOR NO REASON! I feel like most people don't grow out of high school and they just bring their high school mentality to the workplace. I must constantly control the urge to beat the shit out of people...BOY I CAN'T STAND PEOPLE!!!

Hi People!!!! Like anyone reads this LOLOL! I got a job finally! Hopefully, I won't get treated like I have in my last few jobs. I don’t know what it is about me that makes people hate me so much? As I keep repeating, it could be that I am a Chosen and that my Aura intimidate or irritates people! I don’t know. I watch a lot of YouTube videos on it, but I don’t know. It could also be that I look good for my age and that is why I am verbally assaulted at my jobs. Add the fact that I know what I am doing, and it is a recipe for jealousy! Really, I am not trying to tout my own horn but that could be what it is. I still don't get talked to at Starbucks and feel a lot of downlow hostility towards me there, well not just there but everywhere I go. If I go outside, I will feel a hostile vibe towards me, like people are ready to find some weakness in me to exploit. It makes me scared to engage people, because I feel like they are secret enemies, secretly against me. I have talked to my psychiatrist about this, but she just says it could be just my own thinking, but I don't think it is. I do notice people looking at me with murder in their eyes or people acting towards me in a certain way. They think I don't notice it, but I do, like hostility. I try to sit at Starbucks in a defensive position because I get scared that someday I might get approached for a fight. I have already been stalked a few times in this town from men in the gym and once by a man at Starbucks (with his son). So, I am very wary of people. It could be a sign of the times too though...right? Honestly, I really don't go outside much or to bars much because like I said every time I go outside, I get either this feeling that people want to watch me burn, or they want to put me on drugs or alcohol or worse! Every time I go outside, I feel like a multi-millionaire with no bodyguards, and I am in Afghanistan. Its ok, I have a lot of hobbies in my house where it is safe, but even my repair guy wants to make it his life mission to evict me, so it’s not even safe in my apartment...Ahh the Life of a Chosen! Till Next time!